A Dog Tail

Written for the Daily Flash Fiction Challenge with a word limit of 300.

The prompts: This story must start with "Once upon a time"

A Dog Tail (true story)

Once upon a time, my dog walked into the middle of the living room and threw up an entire block of cheddar cheese. It was still intact, retaining most of its brick-like shape, although it was a little rounded on the edges.

I was very impressed. He was such a good boy.

He seemed to be a little embarrassed by the whole ordeal. I am not sure if it was because he threw up or because he had just been caught. Actually, I’m not even sure if he was embarrassed since it was hard to tell if he was blushing or not. 

I also had a pig once. You could tell when she was blushing. Her tummy would turn bright pink and she would avoid eye contact. But, that is another story.

Bear, my dog, was probably trying to pretend to be embarrassed. That would be his best defense. He could claim, “I don’t understand. Nothing like this has ever happened to me before. I have no idea how that cheese got in there. By the way, can I have it back since you probably don’t want it now?”

My wife threw him outside with a scolding. Later I would go out and tell him secretly how proud I was that he could eat so much in one bite. We were pals.

That is life when your dog is the size of a small pony and clever as a fox. He would behave right up to the point where he figured the odds of him not getting caught were in his favor. Like the time he ate an entire dinner for five in under ten seconds. He casually wandered into the kitchen and then wandered right back out. 

Without any evidence or witnesses, we couldn’t pin that one on him.